It's Just Allergies...And Other Bold-Faced Lies Moms Tell

Honesty came uninvited into my life yesterday--I acknowledged that I was feeling symptoms of being sick.  This morning, definitely sick.  BUT I'm really trying to convince myself it's "just allergies" (lucky for me I live in a state where it's "allergy season" pretty much eleven months out of the year).

Why do I try to deny the illness and convince myself it's something much easier to ignore?  Because I lie.

Hello, my name is Amanda, I am a mom and wife, and a LIAR.

I don't condone lying--NOT AT ALL.  I even hate the little lies that are supposed to make people actually feel better (so never, EVER take me swimsuit or jeans shopping--I won't lie to you and your feelings will probably get hurt).  I appreciate honesty at all costs and teach my children the importance of telling the truth, even if you'll get into trouble (see my post on Connor getting punished over all-night gaming).

However, here's an actual TRUTH.  Moms (and Dads too) lie.  We do it because we feel like we have to or have convinced ourselves that it's okay in certain circumstances.  This is my chance to come clean...here are my favorite "mom lies":

1)  "I'm not sick, it's just allergies" (thus alleviating the stress of everyone else in the house and also partly convincing myself that I can take enough Claritin to finally see through the fog--hey, that's what their commercial implies!)
2)  "What?  The boys were cranky while I was gone? *scoff* They were angels all day for me" (when you left the house in the first place because they were actually mini terrorists all day)
3) "I just now showered because Bee was fussy and clingy all day" (really, I watched "Revenge", "Keeping Up With The Kardashians", and "The Carrie Diaries" while he napped)
4) "I wear sweatpants 90% of the time because Bee urps on me so much" (this is a partial truth--he DOES spit up on me...)
5) "Yes, I DID need a new Swiffer/vacuum/mop because our old one was broken.  Seriously.  How was it broken?  Well, that's hard to explain...it was this noise, then a crackle, then maybe some weird grinding?"
6) "No, the Diaper Genie didn't smell that bad the last time I put one in.  It's full, you say?  Oh, well..."
7) "I only go through 1/2 a case of Diet Coke per week"
8) "Yes, I turned the thermostat up because you were cold.  I'm not sure why you can't feel it yet.  I'm sweating."
9) "No really...I'm FINE" (no matter what the situation is, when someone says that, they are most definitely NOT fine)
10) "I don't know where the 2004 *insert name of favorite Oregon Pinot Noir* went".

So those are just a few of my favorite half-truths...I'm sure everyone, parent or otherwise, have a few of their own as well...